mixed

Considerate Artist

After visiting several blogs, I decided to take the personality test too. While the result is mostly accurate -- considerate, open, quiet -- I feel uneasy and highly suspicious of what it says about me, as though I need to somehow disprove that I am all of these things. Similarly, I react the same upon receiving compliments and feel the need to say, "Gee, thanks" with a bewildered expression, only to say, "moving along" in silence. Apparently I spend more time thinking of the "why" questions and less about the "how." My reaction smacks of insecurity, but nothing new there.

Today my cultural crit prof made a reference to a comment I made on Monday, which surprised me (in a good way). My prof isn't easily approachable and can be quite intimidating and stoic that it's hard to tell what he thinks about our comments, and ultimately our intellectual maturity. But here I go again seeking some kind of approval, some validation that I am somehow on the "right" track. So I was content, if only to feel that I contributed something to our discussion, which always makes a difference at the end of the day. Too bad I can't say that my other lit classes are as stimulating as cultural crit.

I have a potential idea for the final paper but still rather inchoate. Idea one is to look at Angela Carter's "The Bloody Chamber" and perhaps think about destablizing fairy tales, myths, the cult of innocence, virginity, and the sadomasochism. I need to look at some articles and see what's being said. Of course, I can also work with a film and link Carter's stories -- I think I love her.