Got a bit of work done today at the cafe with psych girl, which lifted my spirits b/c i've been feeling guilty about being behind on my paper. Nice to sit with a writing pal. I was thinking of putting together a summer writing group and post it on our listserve, but was kind of afraid to do so. Summer is half over! holy crap, holy crap, holy crap. If I make next Monday my fake deadline, I will probably get it back a week later b/c Former Prof is supremely busy. I've been delaying/avoiding sending it off because I think hightly of Former Prof and my paper is in a sad state, maybe even dated, too. I've been trying to modify my ideas (and edit edit edit) so that I can see how it is (or might be) part of a larger, important discussion in queer politics, but my head is so clouded.
what do you do when you've stared at a paper for so long? Lose perspective, that's me. But what does one do? take a break and reread and revise again? It is perpetually hard because my short breaks end up being like 1 week of "I don't want to look at this anymore. this is crap and i can't show it to Former prof at its crappy state. " I think Former Prof will really laugh or just be really, really disappointed. But I need feedback to get me excited to work on it again. Maybe just send it off at its current state? It might mean i've admitted weakness, though. Don't need to keep reminding Former Prof of my weaknesses.
this week is going to be hard because my roommate is moving in tomorrow and we are doing a whole cleaning, organizing and lining all the cabinet drawers with white covers. Maybe I can squirrel away for 2 hours a day? but even that is not nearly enough -- okay, whatever, it is something. At least I will have 2 hours to edit each day for one week?
I hate that summer is almost over.
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